That's IT.

I understand when someone says they can love two people at the same time. I totally understand. I love two people at the same time, each in a different horizon. It's not even funny anymore.

I have to say:
I have lived. I really have. So many things I wanted to do, I never did. So many things I wanted to do I did. Does that mean that I have lived?

Maybe I dont believe in love anymore. They say that a heart only has space for one person. It's a one man list. Mehh. I dont get it.

There's such a thin limit between frienship and love. Why does love exist to begin with? How do you know love exists?
On what basis? In which way and why?

When there are too many thoughts, all at once. They collide and make this one ugly sound like a burp or something. Something completely pointless and meaningless. There's no point of getting them all out.

Oh, I have so many years to live. I have to survive so much unknown. It must be much easier to die. I mean, in a heartbeat, in a bomb, in some ugly shit sinking (not that, I like the sea a bit too much to die in it). But, there has to be so many choices.

One choice.
One choice can ruin my whole life. How can that even make any sense? How can regret make sense? How can..umm. OK.

Should I survive with "I dont know if I love you, but I will know" or should I give up? Should I give up? Is the best choice what appears to be the best option? Why do options even exist.

I have TOO much free time. too much free time makes me go insane. Too much free time is what makes anyone insane because they think too much it makes them go in loops of thought or memory, that's when it becomes LEAST fun. :D

That's it.