The Calm.
My best friend doesn't know how to deal with the calm.
I don't know what to do when there's not at least one calm, one calm thing, one calm feeling, one calm person.
She operates under obsession, obsession with at least one thing, but too much obsession can kill her emotionally. Believe me, it's a fine line between the both of these states of mind.
I have made my peace with all of them. Like she operates with obsession, they operate with fear...and maybe only with fear, fear of losing power, and losing control over their own lives. Making sure no one else can control them, no one mocks them. They operate only under fear of being rejected, all of them. They all feed on each-other's weaknesses.
It's a sick environment.
Bic Runga again. She has almost the opposite effect of Nina Simone. Nine is the crash of reality, Bic is like all your dreams, all the things in your mind, in your eyes...the little sparks and the little reflections.
My best friend is afraid of change. She's afraid of being left, and alone.
It's only of life to leave, and come back. And that's one more thing I can't teach.
3 comments:
you create what you fear.
they tell you that all the time like it somehow gives you some control
or maybe it's just something to say
there's inside calm and there's outside calm. i'd like outside to be calm--then it wouldn't be idiosyncratic to feel serene.
i match my environment. i accept this.
you didn't disappoint me. or at least i dont know how you did-- for disappointment there should be expectation and i dont know what i expected of you.
in that sense i dont think you disappointed him either
it's not the right word. is there a word for watching someone grow up in a moment?
were u the stage manager in Isis? you don't have to answer that if you wanna stay annonymous
d'you know Maria Mena?? she's kinda similar to Runga
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